“When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I”. Psalm 61:2
I live a life that is overwhelmed. Partly by my own doing and partly by the doing of others……okay 95% of my own doing. I am a perfectionist, dependable and a little OCD, all great qualities of someone who can not turn down being asked to complete extra work or tasks. Oh how I wish I was a slacker, getting by doing the absolute minimum work without getting fired. Not caring what work ethic is and settling for mediocre. I tried to be a slacker one time……it lasted like 5 seconds and I was off to work. The sad part of my overwhelmed life is that while I am so overwhelmed and consumed with my job and everything I have going on there I neglect everything else……sleep, health, relationships, family, church, my walk with God………… all of these things 100 times more important than a silly job. A job that could easily not be there or in an instant change………..now I do not want to just transfer my overwhelmed-ness to the rest of my life but I would like to put the same amount of effort into my employment to the rest of my life…….
I found this picture (well one like it) on Pinterest the other day and set it as my lock screen to remind me that in my moments of being overwhelmed I need to give it to God and let go of it…………weirdly enough it kind of works.
Sometimes I think we need those reminders to let it go. Sometimes we just need to be patient and let God work. I probably have mentioned it before but I am not a patient person. I really do not like having to depend on others to do things that I am fully capable of doing myself (and most likely do right). I am a perfectionist and kind of like to be in control…….this causes problems with my walk. If you weren’t aware, God likes to be in control. He likes to have every turned over to Him so He can work, in His own timing….not Jacquie’s timing………..not mine at all. I have always struggled with this……..whether it be in letting God do things or with letting my boyfriend put gas in my truck (sorry babe), I really don’t like things out of my control or feeling like I am helpless or not knowing how things are going to turn out. 95% of my stress or overwhelmed moments are because I am too worried about the unknown and things that have not happened yet.
“To worry is a lack of faith”…….each Tuesday my clients have to do thinking reports where they practice changing their thoughts on situations throughout their weeks. At the end of their thinking reports they need to put attitudes and beliefs. One of the most common is “to worry is a lack of faith”………………such a true statement. While I am sitting there worrying about the outcome of whatever and stressing myself out, I am having such little faith that God is taking care of it. That things are going to workout according to His plan……….His plan………..everything works out when it is His plan……yet I am so consumed in trying to hold onto whatever ounce of control I thought I had that I lose sight of that……I lose sight that this is not my life to control and that God has such a higher purpose for me than the job that I am killing myself over. So I go back to that picture. When I am feeling overwhelmed and stressed and I find myself worrying about the smallest irrelevant things I look at my phone to remind myself to give it to Him. to remind myself that “to worry is a lack of faith”.
P.S. I can listen to this on repeat!